I am weary. I am tired of people telling me if i need to chat to call and them not listening. Instead they excuse behaviour. I am tired of lectures that i already have notes for. I am sick of the false sympathy and patronizing encouragement. I am exhausted of hearing "I am doing what I need to in order to (fill in the blank here)". It hurts that i am not included. I detest when people say its not about me, when really, it is. I hate that i am not enough. That i have never been enough. That other peoples love has greater value than a child's. I wish perception had nothing to do with it. That everyone could see it.
"Then they sat with him on the ground. Seven days and nights they sat there without saying a word. They could see how rotten he felt, how deeply he was suffering."
Right now i want this. I dont want to feel better. I just want people to agree that it sucks. I want people to listen and to not discount my pain.