Saturday, September 22, 2007

Letting go

About two minutes ago i let Jul cross the road by himself for the very first time. I stood outside the gate and watched as he walked to the road, checked both ways and walked proudly across the road. Jul made it safely then turned and gave me a 'thumbs-up', and ran to his friends house.

This is a big step for both of us. For Jul, it was him growing up. For me, its him growing up. I'm just not ready for him to grow up. I know i cant stop it, and really, i dont want to. But i love being so important to him. I love caring for him and ensuring that he is safe and having a good time. I love watching him read, and swim and whatever it is he is doing. Watching my first born need me less and less is wonderful and sad. I know he can do so many things without me... but i like watching. On the other hand i am so excited for him to be doing these things all on his own!

This morning Jul asked if he could start calling me Mom, instead of Mommy, "since I'm starting grade one". That was so heart-breaking to hear. Then he said it! "Mom!" I said that once he is at school, he can call me mom. Just as long as he promises to still call me mommy... Once in a while.


Aphra said...

James calls me 'Aphra'!

jordin said...

really? I worked too hard giving birth to Jul not to be called by the title "Mom", in my opinion.

Rachel said...


The girls hardly ever call me 'Mommy'. It's usually just 'Mom' or, if they're feeling a little needy or whiny or loving, it's 'Mama'.